The Reality

They said you'll have to put what you've learned to work. But I clearly knows that I won't be pursuing what I've majored as I don't feel good in it. Then WHY and HOW COME? They'll asked. Well, honestly speaking, I'm stuck with no choice left, and then I fell for it as it is really an interesting subject to learn so I continue to stick to it but not so after I encounter this...

It has just been 2 months I joined the workforce and be one of the laborer. I'm BORED already. How am I to survive for the rest of my life, God have mercy! Every morning I'm listening and singing to Mix fm when the song by Dolly Parton, 9 to 5 is on air... Reporting to work at 9.00am, lunch in the office with my lunchbox at 1pm, say good bye to colleagues at 5.30pm sharp sharp. In between, I'm answering the phone, I'm calling for payment, I'm standing in front of the photocopy machine, I'm typing quotation/tender, I'm faxing quotation, I'm receiving goods, I'm making calls for unreceived goods, I'm logged on to the company systems for posting, I'm issuing invoices, I'm dealing with suppliers for fault/delayed goods, I'm coping with customers urge for goods supply, I'm preparing reports which include: monthly sales, monthly sales by salesman, monthly debtor list, monthly sales by products, monthly incentive calculation, month quotation feedback, minutes of meeting... I'm suffocating in the space shared by men that smokes like nobody business and boss whom will shout at the top of his lungs " Ni Qu Si!" = " You go DIE!" when the salesman couldn't close a deal or sales target did not achieved at month end. Panic panic panic, eyes on PC, hands on calculator, figuring the difference to achieve the target.

That's the reality part for the major that I've been pursuing all this while. Am I going to stuck to this forever?

Graduation 2006!!!

Thank God for graduating, thank God for being able to make it on time!!!

The In Between ...

After final, spent some time day dreaming and catching up with all the good old books of mine.

Drive all the way up north during the King's Birthday, long weekend with two girlfriends. Supposed to have a tour guide but left us in no where at last minute. Anyhow manage to survive with the map. Met up with a friend in Perai, stay overnight in Tanjung Malim - met few Nestleman, nice people. Then down to Seremban, put a night, met up with another friend for lunch and dinner. Then came back.

Back to line 1.

Then scheduled to travel to Siem Reap (07/08/06 - 12/08/06) for holidays! Thanks to Air Asia for their brilliant marketing & promotion strategy.

Then my convocation on 13/08/06 at Cyberjaya campus. Crazy isn't it, ngam ngam the day I came back from Siem Reap. Luckily able to make it. That shows how well-planned I am.

Then back to line 1.

Then off for travelling again! Bali (27/09/06 - 04/10/06). Thanks to Air Asia Again!

Then back to line 1 again + attend few interviews.

Report to work on 01 November 2006.

Finally Over

Final is over therefore it is finally over... but then suddenly I'm blur with where am I supposed to go and What I'm supposed to do next. Routine complete. Exam complete. Course complete. What's next?

The Quarter-Life Crisis

It is when you stop going along with the crowd and start realizing that there are a lot of things about yourself that you didn't know and may or may not like. You start feeling insecure and wonder where you will be in a year or two, but then get scared because you barely know where you are now. You start realizing that people are selfish and that, maybe, those friends that you thought you were so close to aren't exactly the greatest people you have ever met and the people you have lost touch with are some of the most important ones. What you do not realize is that they are realizing that too and are not really cold or catty or mean or insincere, but that they are as confused as you. You look at your job. It is not even close to what you thought you would be doing or maybe you are looking for one and realizing that you are going to have to start at the bottom and are scared. You miss the comforts of college, of groups, of socializing with the same people on a constant basis. But then you realize that maybe they weren't so great after all. You are beginning to understand yourself and what you want and do not want. Your opinions have gotten stronger. You see what others are doing and find yourself judging a bit more than usual because suddenly you realize that you have certain boundaries in your life and add things to your list of what is acceptable and what is not. You are insecure and then secure. You laugh and cry with the greatest force of your life. You feel alone and scared and confused. Suddenly change is the enemy and you try and cling on to the past with dear life but soon realize that the past is drifting further and further away and there is nothing to do but stay where you are or move forward. You get your heart broken and wonder how someone you loved could do such damage to you or you lay in bed and wonder why you can't meet anyone decent enough to get to know better. You love someone but maybe love someone else too and cannot figure out why you are doing this because you are not a bad person. One night stands and random hook ups start to look cheap and getting wasted and acting like an idiot starts to look pathetic. You go through the same emotions and questions over and over and talk with your friends about the same topics because you cannot seem to make a decision. You worry about loans and money and the future and making a life for yourself and while wining the race would be great, right now you'd just like to be a contender! What you may not realize is that everyone reading this relates to it. We are in our best of times and our worst of times, trying as hard as we can to figure this whole thing out.

by unknown

Quotes

"Life is a series of pulls back and forth. You want to do one thing, but you are bound to something else. Something hurts you, yet you know it shouldn't. You take certain things for granted, even when you know you should never take anything for granted." ~ Tuesdays with Morrie, Mitch Albom